When you face off against an incredibly sensitive Code Of Conduct policy at your workplace.
The following is what I DID NOT say to a woman who seems to have a great deal of animosity towards me:
I am sorry, but I think you may have confused me with someone else you hate. I am not Satan, nor am I the person in charge of women's dress sizes. I am also not the person who makes the puzzles on Wheel of Fortune so darn tricky. I hope that clears things up between the two of us.
Instead, I merely said 'Good Morning' and tried not to stare as she rolled her eyes so far around they threatened to tear away from her optic nerve.
of my Guy Card for this post, but I'll make up for it in the end.
So I needed some sheets for my bed; sure, my Classic Transformers set was still good, but I thought it was time to move on.
Normally, I'd go to my closest retail juggernaut and buy whatever what was on sale and fairly non-flammable, but with a new job and a tiny bit of disposable income, I thought it would be wise to put a bit of thought in the decision. After all, next to your workplace and your car, you're spending a big chunk of your life in bed.
So it's off to the retail jungle.
I have to admit I am conflicted about these Bed, Bath, Linens N' Beyond Things places. On the one hand, they are TV Gadget Cavalcades. If there's an infomercial about it, odds are it's here. Unfortunately, all of it is surrounded by an almost impenetrable wall of pillows that aren't meant to be rested on, towels you can't use, and things called shams and valences.
But back to the story.
After an initial case of sticker shock [so much for the 1000 thread count], I decided to go for something different.
There's this fabric called modal that's made from beechwood. [Insert Budweiser joke here]. Like all things, Wikipedia has more info on the subject.
All I can tell you is that these sheets are amazing. Super soft and extremely comfortable. Mike approves.
And now, as a special thank you for enduring that post, I give you: