Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Meeting A Need...

"Hey Mike," I'm asked all the time,

"Where can I find a foam cover for my cell phone that looks like a banana? No, seriously."

Before, I would just shrug my shoulders and say a silent prayer. But now, someone has answered the call.

Now a frantic world can rest easily.


Mike G.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

My Stars and Garters...

I did this once before, and with the current news, I figured it was a good time to do it again. Say hi to Kelsey Grammer. His claim to fame? Playing the same character[Frasier Crane] for about 20 years. He's just been signed to play a role in a very anticipated film. Which one? Check the next post. Posted by Hello

Tossed Salad and Mutated DNA?

This is Hank McCoy, better known to the world as the Beast. He possesses incredible agility, as well as incredible strength and acrobatic dexterity. He is also a brilliant biochemist. In addition to his duties as a member of the X-Men, he has maintained a reserve status in The Avengers.

Yup, Frasier Crane/Sideshow Bob is going to be Beast in X-Men 3. Click here for the full scoop.

I just don't know. First, Bryan Singer left to go do Superman. Then Marvel/20th Century Fox decided to hire Matthew Vaughn, who's only directed one other film. It does look like all the previous cast is locked down, so that's a positive. As far as Beast goes, while I think Kelsey's a good match vocally, I hope they plan on a bunch of CGI or stuntmen if the script calls for anything besides Beast sitting down drinking tea.


Mike G.

Posted by Hello

Friday, May 27, 2005

Very Inappropriate...

My niece turned 1 year old a few days ago. I want to position myself as the 'cool' relative who can stop by, spoil her for a few hours, and take off. I wound up getting her shoes with built-in squeakers, but for a few minutes I thought about getting her this. I'm thinking next year? Drum Kit. Posted by Hello

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Very Appropriate...

I'm a big fan of Arena Football, and even though Dallas tanked at the end of the season, I'm still looking forward to the ArenaBowl, which is in Vegas this year.

A few days ago, the AFL released details regarding the pre- and post-game entertainment. Bryan Adams and Maroon 5 are playing some events, but what caught my eye was the group that will play after the ArenaBowl Trophy is given to the winning team...

Kool And The Gang.

My guess is that after crunching the numbers, it turned out that hiring the band would be a better deal than paying the fees for 'Celebration', the quintessential victory song.

Also, Dennis Quaid and the Sharks will be performing at the ArenaBall Awards. I didn't know either.


Mike G.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Goodbye Tony...

Hey Guys,

Sad to report that Thurl Ravenscroft passed away earlier this evening. While the name may sound odd, if you've ever eaten cereal, watched a Chistmas Special on TV, or been to Disney's Haunted Mansion, you've heard his voice. Mark Evanier [who once mentioned this site] gives us a small look at his life.


Mike G.

Monday, May 23, 2005


Tomorrow, Bro. Mike and I [who just got back on the blogging horse] will be reviewing the WWE's latest effort, Judgment Day. Richard posted my predictions on
his site, and I did pretty well, even though it was fairly easy.

9:00-ish, on 1310 The Ticket.

Your pal,

Mike G.

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Real Desperation?

Like most of the male population, I've developed a healthy, non-stalkerish admiration for Eva Longoria [happy, lawyers?]. That is, until I saw this picture of her. I freely admit I know very little about tattoos and their symbolism, but I can't help but think that Ms. Eva earned that star on her wrist by shanking a fellow inmate in the exercise yard with a sharpened toothbrush. Posted by Hello

Maybe it's just me.


Mike G.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

And So It Ends...

if you don't don't count the books, graphic novels, video games, cartoons, role-playing games, and toys.

Last night/this morning, I braved the lines to see Episode III, then stumbled home for a few hours sleep before heading to another theater to see the digitally projected version.

Worth every bloodshot minute.

I am a bit resentful that George Lucas decided to wait till the 'last film' to make any sort of effort in the storytelling department. His depiction of Anakin's fall into darkness is tragic and almost heartbreaking, and I can't help but think what if George had tried as hard with the previous two films.

A few moments stand out for me...

Whatever combination of CGI, latex, and digital manipulation was employed, I salute the alchemists at ILM. The moment when Chancellor Palpatine dons his hood and truly becomes the Emperor is absolutely perfect. The kicker to this scene is the Ian McDarmid's delivery of his lines.

I want to take this moment and apologize to the lovely Ms. Amy Allen, who played the Twi'lek Jedi Aayla Secura. Devin and I had a chance to speak with her a few days ago at the Sci-Fi Expo, and at the time we had heard rumors that her character might be featured in some sort of Star Wars televison show. when asked, she seemed a bit apprehensive, but we took that to mean some sort of unspoken confirmation.

Unless a leather halter top can block laser fire at close range, I guess that won't be happening.

Click here to learn more about the alluring Twi'lek.

All in all, the film did a good job in setting the audience up for the despair that the Empire will inflict upon the galaxy, and the beginnings of rebellion.


Mike G.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

People Are Just Wrong...

Animals cannot consent.

That seems to be a fairly self-evident statement.

But it looks like someone had to reinforce that point. In a world as big as this one, it stands to reason that no matter what makes your pants go crazy, there's someone out there ready and willing to provide you with that very fetish/obsession.

Are you a gadget fan? Maybe you're into the Telly Savalas look. But if you long for a hot chick taking down a buffalo, and then getting it on with some guy mere feet from the once-living beast, you might have to wait a while.

According to AVN, a company was all set to do just that. The worst part of this whole story is the fact that I'm realizing now that once I post this story, my incoming traffic might change a bit.

Your pal,

Mike G.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005


Posted by Hello

The Christopher Reeve Paralysis Foundation is doing something incredibly cool to raise funds and awareness. In the tradition of the Lance Armstrong bracelet, the CRPF is selling these tags for a darn good price of 10 bucks for a set of two. Click here for ordering information.

Your pal,

Mike G.

Sunday, May 15, 2005


Apparently, if you walk around with some recoding equipment and say you're a reporter, that's all you need.

Devin of the SwampLog and I went to the Sci-Fi Expo this weekend, with the goal of interviewing several of the guests there for later broadcast on the P1WAC during this week of Star Wars Mania. Big thank yous to all of the staff who were incredibly gracious, and picked up on the fact that we weren't there to do a 'nerds on parade' type piece.

We spoke to stars from both trilogies, and while I'm not sure when the segments will be on the show, I do know that Devin is planning to assemble a podcast on his site very soon.

Take Care,

Mike G.

Friday, May 13, 2005

Keep Your Ears Listening...

While the Bai Ling audio will be saved for next week, tonight the P1WAC will be featuring the previously mentioned Phase 2 of Whip-A-Stripper. Please tune in.

Your pal,

Mike G.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Pass the Maalox...

I'm not the world's biggest Burger King fan, but it looks like I'll have to learn to love it.

On the positive side, if I do collect all of them I might finally fill that gaping void in my life!

Your pal,

Mike G.

Non-Intentional Star Wars Reference...

Part-Time actor, Playboy model and all-around fashion victim Bai Ling will have the honor of being interviewed by Richard and myself tomorrow night. She was to have a small role in Episode III, but was left on the cutting room floor. Considering some of the photos I've seen, I wouldn't be surprised if she used the film for her next outfit.


Mike G.

The Force Was Strong In This One...

I hate to admit it, but it looks like the second time was the charm.

Though I prefer to wait till we get a complete scoring report form the judges, I think it's safe to say that we might have a winner in 'whip-a-stripper' 2005. Of course I'll give you the heads up as to when we'll broadcast the audio. for now, a quick preview...

This time around, I refined my approach. My goal was to portray myself as not just a nerd, but a confident, almost cocky nerd. In fact, I would be able to take any and all of these women home with me because of my Star Wars nerdness.

Also, when a stripper tells you, "I'll be right back", is she lying? I was able to put that theory to the test.

I learned that maybe going for the silver or the bronze is the better choice in the long run.

Well, I have to wash the body glitter off of me.

Take care,

Mike G.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

A Hive of Scum and villainy?

Nah, just implants and G-Strings.

Phase two of the P1WAC's grand experiment begins later tonight, as I will attempt to win the hearts of various 'self-employed models' with my vast knowledge of Star Wars. If they can fight through my love of podracing, midi-chlorians and the engineering prowess of the Colicoid race, they'll be substantially rewarded. My reward? A fully subsidized trip to a strip club. So really, everyone wins.

Yours in The Force,

Mike G.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

M Is For The Million Things She Gives Me...

A big Churn shout-out all the mothers out there. You do way too much and are vastly unappreciated.

And, because I can't help being dark, I noticed that some schools around here had their Prom last night.

So, another Churn shout-out to all the brand new moms-to-be out there, just coming out of their hangovers. I hope he remembers your name on Monday gals!

Your pal,

Mike G.

Friday, May 06, 2005

Geeks Need Warmth, Too.

Courtesy of the Greatness of Boing Boing, the dilemma of what to do with all the promo T-shirts in your house is now solved. And no, giving them to the homeless doesn't count. Sorry.

Your Pal,

Mike G.

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Arriba, Arriba!

Please tune in later tonight, as I will be partaking in the P1WAC's Cinco de Mayo festivities. Richard said he'll be bringing together all the Hispanic listeners of The Ticket, so I guess it'll be about 6 or 7 of us.

Take Care,

Mike G.

Monday, May 02, 2005


Yeah, but not too much.

So, the Mavericks have tied up their series with Houston, and you must be wondering how you can show your support for Dallas's favorite German.

You could buy one of these.

Take Care,

Mike G.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

So Would They Call It Blog-ola?

First off, know that Churn adheres strictly to an iron-clad set of values, and nothing on this Earth will make me compromise them. Let's set aside the fact that I'm not that sure what those values are right now. As I've said before, this blog might not be that great, but it's 100% me.

Except, when I forget to give credit to someone.

Or if it was really funny and I'm stuck for something to write.

Also, Churn refuses to feed at the Corporate trough. One cannot be free to speak if they are beholden to a faceless entity's checkbook.

That said...

If you want high quality footwear, clothing and accessories with a modern edge, Etnies should be your destination. Also, whether it's a backpack, golf bag, overnight or messenger bag you need, look no further than Ogio.

Take Care folks,

Mike G.